Thursday, April 14, 2011

No More Coasting. . .

I realized something yesterday. I am inherently lazy. Well, relatively speaking. I spend most days working from the time I wake up until the time I go to sleep if you consider nursing working. But yesterday, I managed to get the house cleaner while watching my 4 kids and my 2 nieces with a headache than I get it when my sister and BIL are around to help and I feel fine. You would think having more adults around would result in getting more done and honestly, before yesterday I thought that it was having 7 kids around was what was holding me back from getting done all that needs to be done. Now, I think its me. I think when there are more adults around, I give myself permission not to do all that I can do. I allow myself not to do the best I can do. Instead, I coast along, doing less than I could otherwise do. I am limiting myself and ignoring my self-imposed limitations. Or, rather, I was. Now that I've acknowledged it, I am holding myself responsible for figuring out what to do to fix it. I don't want to be lazy. I don't want to coast along. I want to do my best because my kids and I deserve my best all the time. Not just when I'm the only adult around. So y'all are my witnesses. NO MORE COASTING for me.

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